Three, two, one........Treatment

Yesterday was a long day. The goal at the end of the day was to have me receive the first round of my new treatment.  It started with the usual blood work in order to check my platelet count, liver function and tumor marker.  These numbers turned out as follows:  liver function numbers were ok but on the high side, tumor marker went up to 111, which I knew it would go up since I have not had treatment for 4 weeks and platelets were at 85, which is lower than they want but close enough.(this will be watched very closely and the option of removal of my spleen is still on the table if my platelet number stays under 90.) Next was the inspection of my fingers.  The stitches were just taken out Tuesday so the healing process was not totally complete.  After some discussion we decided to go ahead with the treatment as long as I promised to watch my wound for improper healing.  I have also been having some lower back pain for the past couple weeks, so I told them.  This prompted them to immediately call radiology and set up a couple of x-rays just to make certain it was not cancer related.  It was not.  The radiologist said I have some disc degeneration caused by....You guessed it, lengthy chemotherapy treatment!  They told me to rest my back and take some anti inflammation meds.  After all this I was finally cleared to get my infusion.  The infusion itself went without a hitch, although I could definitely tell I was getting a powerful medication pumped into me.  I really can't explain the feeling, you just know somethings up when your whole body gets warm.  I also resumed the chemo pills,  so I am once again at full speed ahead.  As of now I do not feel any strange side effects, I am just very tired.  I know I will start getting my energy back as my body gets used to the meds.  I have to admit it feels good to get back in the battle and start kickin some cancer butt again.  Keep praying.

Thank you !!

I just wanted to acknowledge and thank all the people who helped me celebrate my birthday and my cancerversary. I've been asked why I would celebrate my one year anniversary of being diagnosed with cancer.  I know it sounds weird and most people would look at it as a negative but, if you were told you only had 1-2 months to live after your diagnosis and now it's 1 year later and you are still here to celebrate your birthday, you would want to celebrate too. Your messages and comments are very important to me and I love reading them.  The outpouring of support I have received over this past year has been powerful and has aided in my battle more than you could ever know.
I am starting a whole new phase of treatment this week and I will need your prayers and support as much as ever.  I get my stitches out on Tuesday and start the new chemo on Wednesday.  I feel just like I did when I was in grade school and my vacation was coming to an end and school was starting again. Well, I guess my chemo vacation is coming to an end and now it is time to start the battle again.
Thank you for your continued support.  Keep praying!

Happy Thanksgiving

Let's not forget the opportunity to give thanks today.  It seems that lately we have forgotten the reason behind Thanksgiving.  It is referred to as "turkey day" and sometimes it feels that today is just the launch pad for Black Friday.  Take the time today to give thanks for the things you have and thank the people who are special in your life.  In this fast paced world we do not always have the time to recognize what we have.  Today is the day that has been specifically set aside to do just that, so don't waste the chance.  Have a great day and thank you for all the support over this past year.  

Happy Cancerversary!

One year ago today I went in for a routine colonoscopy  Unfortunately the results from that procedure have changed my life.  The doctor found a large tumor which turned out to be cancerous.  To add insult to injury, they also told me the cancer had moved to my liver.  That is when everything went into "whatever you say mode".  We will be keeping you in the hospital.  OK.  You will have surgery tomorrow afternoon.  OK.  Drink this, swallow that.  OK.  Call your family members.  OK.  Everything will be fine.  OK.  We will do our best.  OK.  You have to make an appointment with an oncologist right away.  OK.  I was just along for the ride and what a ride it has been.  God was now at work assembling my support team.  Thanks to a great surgeon, my surgery went as good as it could.  The hospital team got me up and out in record time.  The oncologist, based on percentages, gave me little chance of survival but, he opted for a very aggressive treatment plan.  The nurses in the oncology department were always positive, helpful and caring.  My family and friends circled the wagons and gave me more energy and support than I could have ever asked for.  When God picks your team, don't bet against it.  I just lived a year longer than any of the "experts" thought I would and it's been a blast.  I have realized the importance of truly enjoying what is happening around you.  I have been shown how important family and friends are.  I have experienced the healing power of the Lord when the NP told Vic and I that there was something other than medicine at work based on my results.  My cancer may shrink my life in years but, it has caused my appreciation for my life and the people in it to grow. My goal is just to enjoy every day I have left more than the year before and tell everyone I know to do the same.  I'm going to start by making this Thanksgiving better than last year.  It shouldn't be that tough since last year I was in the hospital sipping chicken broth for my dinner.  Well, I have to start somewhere.  Thank you for all the prayers and support over this past year and God willing I am looking forward to more.    

Finger surgery update

I wanted to wait a couple days to make certain everything was going ok before I reported on the success of my surgery.  Well, everything is going well.  The surgery was performed with a nerve block and I would like to say that when the surgeon said I would feel a little pressure and a slight needle prick he was lying.  It felt like he was cutting my finger off.  Now, on a pain scale of 1-10 I would put the pain at a 5 unless I bump my finger on something, which for some reason happens all the time and then it goes up to 12.  It is amazing how often you bang your index finger on things.  Now we just have to heal as fast as possible so I can get back on treatment.  It's going to be a big week coming up for me with Thanksgiving, birthdays and my 1 year diagnosis anniversary.  It feels good to write that!  Thanks for the support and prayers.

How are you feeling?

Since my last post I have received a lot of inquiries from people asking how I'm feeling.  The honest short answer is that I feel good.  I'm able to get around, walk the dog, eat what I want and function pretty much normally.  I guess that is my definition of feeling good.  If I could not do these things I guess my answer would be that I don't feel so good.  To me it is really that simple.

Now, ask me what I am feeling and it is time for you to sit back and take time to read this.
From the time of diagnosis until today I have gone through a litany of very strong feelings.  I've tried to tie an event to a feeling.

• Surprised : When I was told I have high liver function numbers after a routine physical.
• Nervous : When I was sent to the hospital for a scan of my liver.
• Scared : When during my colonoscopy I was told I have a very large tumor and I would not be leaving the hospital until I had surgery to remove it.
• Shocked : When the surgeon showed me the amount of tumor involvement in my liver was 100 times more than I thought it would be. 
• Elated : When the surgeon told me he had removed my colon tumor without me needing a colostomy bag.
• Confused :  After my surgery I was out of it. As time has gone by I have been hearing more and more of what I said and how I acted toward everyone in my room.  Sorry!!
• Thankful : That I have the best group of family and friends as my support group to back me up on this battle.  
• Lonely : When everyone was enjoying Thanksgiving dinner and I was in the hospital drinking chicken broth.
• Grateful : That everyone pitched in and helped Vic with Thanksgiving dinner and made it  a wonderful day.
• Overwhelmed : When we saw the oncologist for the first time and we were told my cancer was  terminal and depending how treatment goes my time here was not going to be real long.
• Guilty : For allowing this to happen to Vic. This was not how it was supposed to be.  We had plans for our future that have all changed now.  She has had to take on burdens that no one should have to.  I wish it was different for her.
• Hopeful : After my first couple of treatments my tumors shrunk at a high rate and I was tolerating the chemo well.
• Inspired : The Lord has been with me from the start.  I feel blessed to receive his healing power everyday and my faith in him is stronger than ever.
• Proud : I have the greatest boys a father could ever ask for.  They have been by my side every step of the way with positive attitudes and actions.  Having the opportunity to see them perform and excel in the field of sports has fulfilled a dream of mine.  To see Matt become a great father to my grand children is wonderful.  To be able to see Sam graduate, get a job and coach is a blessing for me.
• Anxious : I just don't know what is in store for me next.  My tumors have been shrinking and then growing.  The treatments work very well and then they don't.  What's next?
• Over The Moon : Anything to do with the grand daughters. They truly make me feel like there is nothing wrong in my life.
• Tearful : Anytime I think about what I will miss with the girls.
• Joy : Finding out that I will have a grandson.  Knowing that I will be here for his birth!
• Determined :  I will do whatever I have to in order to give this cancer a good fight.
• Loved : Everyday I feel the love of my family.  It is their love that has helped me stay positive throughout this battle.
• Anger : Whenever I think about what I am going to miss.
• Peaceful : Knowing my life is in the hands of the Lord

  That is the difference between how I am feeling vs what I am feeling. Say a prayer for my finger surgery tomorrow!


 

Time for a new course of treatment

We met with the oncologist today to review the PET scan results and blood work numbers.  I will give the technical results first.  My liver function is at a good level.  My platelet count was up to 102.  This is the highest my platelets have been since June.  The main reason for this is the fact that I have not been getting my full course of chemo for 3 weeks.  More on my platelets later.  My tumor marker was up again and came in at 52, which was not a big surprise due the time off treatment.  The PET scan verified there is increased tumor activity in my liver.  Based on all this info, the doctor was not real happy with the results this course of treatment is now showing.  Just for a review, I am currently taking two types of chemo meds.  Xeloda is taken orally twice per day for 2 weeks and then I take 1 week off.    I have been taking the Xeloda from the beginning.  The major side effects I have experienced  are numbness of the extremities and it contributes to my low platelet count.  The other drug is Erbitux.  This is an infusion that I receive weekly.  The major side effects from this is my skin rash and my chronic finger infections.  I have been taking Erbitux since May.  There has been only two times that I have been taken off treatment for more than a week.  One was towards the end of June and the other is now.  Both were the result of finger infections and the surgery performed in order to fix them.  The doctor decided the Erbitux is now doing more harm than good.  There is nothing we can do to stop the finger problems and we cannot afford extended breaks in treatment.  We are switching to a new drug, Avastin.  This drug is administered via a 4 to 5 hour infusion every 3 weeks.  The side effects of this drug are numerous but we won't know how they will affect me until I'm on the drug.  The one thing we do know is that this drug cannot be used if you have any wound healing in progress because it cuts off blood supply to new tissue growth.  It does not know the difference between tumor growth or good tissue growth.  Now here comes the kicker.  The key to being able to take this drug is based on a good platelet count.  If my count is too low I will not be allowed to get the treatment.  The doctor then told us that there was another way to increase my platelet count.  The PET scan showed my spleen was enlarged.  The doctor explained that my spleen had engorged itself at the same time my liver was becoming enlarged due to tumors.  My spleen is hoarding platelets and it may have to be removed.  This is a last resort because I would have to be off treatment for 2 months and my tumors would have a free for all in my liver.  So here is how it is going to go in a nutshell.  I will have surgery on my finger this coming Thursday.  We will give it time to heal.  The chemo treatment will resume the week of Nov 26th and the usual numbers tracking will begin again.
When Vic and I left the doctors office our heads were spinning.  We both just saw that my cancer was getting worse not better.  For the first time since my diagnosis we saw the oncologist struggle with a decision about how aggressive to keep my treatment.  We felt he knows he is running out of options and he needs to use them wisely in order to optimize my treatment.  We put our arms around each other,  sighed and just kept walking.  As we turned the corner for a long walk down the hallway we noticed only one person walking towards us.  As if on cue, it was the hospital chaplin.  He stopped and asked if everything was ok and we told him we had just received some bad news.  He immediately took us to the side and we prayed together.  When we were done he anointed me with healing oil.  God knows when we need him the most and is always there.  Sometimes we get so much on our minds that we just feel overwhelmed and we forget to ask for his help.  This is what happened today and the Lord stepped in and made himself available to hear our prayers.  Now how great is that?  Keep praying and sending positive thoughts.  Thanks for the support.        

Finger update

I met with the surgeon today regarding how to attack my finger infection.  After an examination of the fingers the doctor told me what I wanted to hear.  He suggested we try another round of medication as opposed to surgery.  All he had to do is discuss this course of treatment with my Oncologist and get his approval.  That part did not go so well.  I will be scheduled for surgery ASAP.  My Oncologist wants me back on the chemo treatments right away and the surgery is the quickest way to take care of the fingers.  The good news is that they are going to be able to do this surgery on an outpatient basis.  All I have to do is get a nerve block and a local anesthetic and they can cut away, stitch me up and send me home.  The next major appointment this week will be on Thursday when I get a PET scan.  Then Friday for my meeting with the Oncologist for game planning.  It does make the week fly by!  Talk to you all soon with more updates.  Keep praying!

Cancer gave me the finger again

I had my appointment today and it did not go well.  My blood work numbers did show some good things with my liver functions at a good range and my platelets up to 80 from 62.  The rest was downhill.  I failed to mention in my last week numbers update that my tumor marker went up 10 points.  This week it went up 4 more points and sits at 34.  I don't like that the number is going up but I can accept it knowing I haven't had an infusion for two weeks.  What I'm having a problem with is the fact that they cancelled my infusion again this week because of the finger infection.  Plus, to add insult to injury, I have to see the surgeon again in order to take care of the problem.  I will see the surgeon next week Tuesday for a consultation.  There is a chance that if I need a procedure it could be done in his office since only one finger is really bad.  Next week will be a week full of information.  I meet with the surgeon, I have a PET scan and a meeting with the oncologist to review everything that has been going on.  One more thing that has got me a little on edge is the fact that I am getting a cold.  Normally this would not be a problem but, I am told with my immune system compromised by the chemo I have a much higher chance of developing pneumonia from a common cold.  I've said it before and I'll say it again "No one said this would easy."  I have to continue to remind myself how far I have come since the beginning.  Most importantly I must put my trust in God and his plan for my future.  Keep praying and stay tuned!